PIVOTING ON A DECISION - going to Rwanda

In mid December I was invited to consider joining a group of eight people who will travel in mid-January to Rwanda to share faith in Christ. In brief, groundwork has already been laid there for these eight people, each to have a translator and one other person accompany them to visit in family homes to share with residents how one can have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ that results in the forgiveness of sin and a new way of living life by faith. The purpose is multi-fold, to bring people to saving faith in Christ, to train people to share faith, to establish a followup discipleship program for respondents. This is a help, and it becomes an investment in local Rwandan churches where there is risk.

An apology was extended to me for what was short notice for me, since I was required to raise my own funds for the trip. I needed to ascertain my own interest in such a venture and to consider my age, my physical and financial resources. I needed to face my fears and concerns. I took several days to determine my choice. And although I composed a letter with which to respond to the person who invited me, I also wrote a poem to help myself through the process of coming to a decision. Here is what I wrote.

PIVOTING ON A DECISION

I tangle between fear and faith

With a decision I must make

So little time to ponder

Yet with years enough to make me wise.

At my current age, health and means, 

Enthusiasm yields to caution that's untimely

Since only days remain in which to choose

An action that may lead to life or death.

The life or death equation is not my own

But that of whomever waits a day's flight from here

To whom I might go to share good news

That leads from death to life.

Fear derives from details over which I have no control.

Faith rests in One for whom all things are possible.

Does plunging headlong into ignored truths 

Equate with faith? I ask myself. 

Must I discount age, health and means to evidence my faith? 

Or might faith inform me that I should stay,

That I should pray for those who go?

Such is the tangle of my thoughts.

Good news is appropriate for me to share 

Not only there but here.

If I choose by faith not to go, the One will still deliver

Life-giving news in that distant place, 

And those to whom I might have gone

Will meet me when One brings us home.

© Ron Unruh, Dec 16, 2018